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My guy showed up on our first date wearing an awkward leather golf jacket and an oversize neon green polo shirt.
Many, many dates later now, I'm glad I didn't dismiss him. If the last dude you met on Hinge spent the night talking about all of your shared connections in a way that suggested he's slept with most of them, he doesn't deserve a second shot at your awesomeness. Yes, he could be a dud, but he could also be really nervous.__On your second attempt, try something a little more fun than going to dinner so there's less pressure on making forced conversation. Even if he's not for you, as long as he's relatively interesting and not a creep, invite him and his buddies out for some Sunday Funday action with your girlfriends."Shared history brings a comfort we especially want as we get older," says psychologist Stan Tatkin, author of Your Brain on Love. Dating wasn't high on Debby's priority list; she had recently ended a long relationship that followed her divorce."People from our past often have a unique and appealing perspective on us — and we on them. But that all changed after she and Jeff talked until they closed down a New Jersey restaurant near their homes.What might have been if that onetime relationship hadn't ended, or what might transpire if you reconnected once again?Maybe you've already reconnected with a college boyfriend on Facebook, or Googled that girl from high school on whom you had a maddening crush. But for some, reconnecting with a former flame can be a familiar and comfortable way to find lasting love.Just how many of those old friends turn into new partners is harder to pinpoint.But however long-lost loves reunite — a social site, a dating site, a phone call, a note or even a chance meeting at a reunion or a funeral — there's an allure in rekindling a simmering flame. When Debby Klein agreed to have dinner four years ago with her old buddy Jeff Stiel, she was unclear if it was a date or just two old camp-counselor friends getting together at the urging of a mutual friend.Over 47 years, each married and divorced multiple times. And once, when both were single, they even talked about getting back together."I was an idiot [for not rekindling the romance at that time]," Prentiss says.My father was a street-smart rough guy who didn't think intellectual knowledge was worth anything." Janice's mother's support notwithstanding, the young lovers were unable to make it work. Prentiss went on to graduate from Harvard Law School and practice in the San Francisco Bay Area.Janice moved to Los Angeles and eventually to Reno, Nevada, to run her family's diving board business.